We wanted to have a special day marking Grayson's arrival with our closest family. It was a very small affair that we planned while Kevin and Rosie were visiting.
There are many others that we know will play a huge part of Grayson's life, but once we started looking at our circles outside of this group the numbers increased A LOT and the party
became overwhelming instead of do-able. Below is the actual "Naming" part that Doug read to Grayson.
The rest of the ceremony included advice from our parents, a book read by Leslie, a poem by Rosie and a song(and MC-ing) by Wayd.
All in all it was a happy and emotional day--thanks to all who came and took part!(Sammi was sick :( we missed her!)
Grayson Michael Weber
We as your parents are so happy to have you here. Safe and sound. The last 3 months we have had such a great time getting to know all of your tiny little ways, pinching your sweet cheeks and kissing your tiny little fingers and toes. We are painfully aware that all too soon you'll be big and we will yearn for these days back again. So we are taking it all in, every moment of you--ness we can get we are taking. Today though, we want to take some time, right now, while things are still new, to give you some insight into the name we chose for you as well as to promise you a few things things.
First let’s start with your name.
We really really did not want to mess that part up. After all your name is your first impression, your brand to the world. It is, in many ways, weaved into who you are and how you become who you will be. What a responsibility to give someone a name! We chose Grayson first, simply because it suited you. We had several names picked out but this one really was the only choice once we met you. It reflects strength and style, subtlety and cleverness with just a hint of nostalgia. We often find that in our own life the truth lies in the Gray, the fun, and the richness of most things can be found not in the extremes, the black and white, but somewhere in the middle. The Gray’s. We had only known you 3 or 4 days when we decided for sure that this would be your first name, but something told us it was supposed to be yours.
We gave you a name without too much historical baggage in order to set you on a course to forge new meaning and impress on all you meet a positive association free from any preconceived notion or expectation. Look at it as a blank canvas--you are free to be who you choose.
Now on to your middle name.
Your mom is very very proud of her family and the closeness they share. The Bench family is very much a clan, and growing up a Bench is the source of great pride for her. Aesthetics aside, her first choice for your middle name may well have been Bench but it wasn't specific enough( and as you will learn your mom has never been good at leaving aesthetics aside) According to your Grandma Heather, Mickelle’s name was chosen because it is the feminine form of Michael after her father your Grandpa Bench. Additionally, you have an Uncle Michael, and also my parents gave me the middle name Michael. So no matter what we decided your first name would be your middle name was destined to be Michael. Your Grandpa Bench, the original Michael, is welcoming and kind, gives people the benefit of the doubt, always plays devils advocate, and will always welcome one more to any party. Together he and your Grandma have built a family of which anyone would be proud. They value family above all else. A lesson we truly hope you take with you. They choose authenticity over glamor, honest work over the easy way out, and offer a quiet but potent example of putting the people who mean the most to you, first. May you inherit their kind hearts, their loyal spirits and their green thumb!
Lastly, and never to be forgotten, you are a Weber. A name for which you should be proud. The Webers are known for their keen minds, their kindness and their industrius ways. They are devoted friends and loyal to the end. No one can out work, or out love a Weber. My family, since they immigrated to the United States, have been practicing Mormons and many still are. As you will learn, your Mother and I have not chosen that path and would not choose it for you. However, … take all the good there is from this heritage, internalize it and use it in your life as you would any tool. My advice to you is quite simply, trust in yourself and your own ability to make decisions and choose right from wrong. There are a lot of hard decisions in life and no one can make those decisions better than you. There is some comfort in feeling like you know all the answers, but there is more lasting freedom in choosing to always be questioning. The world is full of adventures waiting to be had. Practice moderation in all things, treat others as you would choose to be treated, and be and let be. There is truth, beauty and fulfillment to be found in all things and ways of thinking. Do not ever feel the need to limit yourself. Let these principles guide you and you will find any answer you are seeking and enjoy a full and well lived life indeed!
Finally Grayson there are a few things that we want to promise you as your parents. We cannot promise to be perfect in their execution but we will try.
1) We will love you and support you no matter what happens in your life, or in ours. It seems simple, and perhaps goes without saying, but we will.
2) We promise to work as a team and have the best marriage we can for you, and for us. We love each other so much that we decided to have a you! You are first and foremost an expression of our love for one another and our wish for it to never end. We choose each other every moment of every day. And choose you always, thick or thin--you are our life’s work and joy.
3) We promise to laugh with you(and at times at you) cry with you, guide you, and listen to you. We promise to try to know just what you need to hear when faced with life’s many challenges and to teach you to build a community to turn to when we do not. If you were to look around this room we have tried to get you started, you can always turn to any one of these people for guidance:
You’ve got Max and Susan who are adventurous and studious. If you ever need a good book or a good laugh you can count on them! You will be better for knowing them, as we all are.
Uncle Michael and Aunt Sammi: their kindness and subtle, careful ways are to be admired. They will not offer advice unless asked but never mistake that as not having lots of wisdom to give.
Uncle Kevin and Aunt Rosie who’s fun ways and never ending energy always make for a great time. They are true craftsman in the life they have built together. They have a thirst for knowledge and a insatiable lust for life. Your cousins already love you too--what a gift!
Grandma and Grandpa Bench who will teach you to grow a garden and brew your own beer!
If you are really lucky they will teach you to fish or waterski!
Uncle Tom and Aunt Leslie who among other things could teach you to refurbish a house, plan a party, mountain bike and make a good stiff drink--and that is just on a saturday!
And last,
Grandma and Grandpa Weber who are true renaissance people--any question you have, they will know(or know how to find) the answer, they will teach you to love and cherish life, and to always be game for any new adventure.
Grayson we cannot believe that we could ever love anyone as much as we love you. Never forget that you are worthy, but not entitled to all the good life has to offer. Work hard and it will find you. You are a gift to us and if you will allow us to be active spectators in your life we will count ourselves among the luckiest people alive.
This is your life and your name--we know you will use them wisely
Mama and Daddy
If
If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too:
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;
If you can dream---and not make dreams your master;
If you can think---and not make thoughts your aim,
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same:.
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build'em up with worn-out tools;
If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings,
And never breathe a word about your loss:
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on!"
If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with Kings---nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much:
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And---which is more---you'll be a Man, my son!
Rudyard Kipling
